Life,  Misc

A Letter to My 13-Year-Old Self

I’ve been inspired by bloggers like Pauline and Georgie and their letters to their younger selves and I thought I would do something similar. When I was 13 (about 7 years ago), I was going through a very hard, awkward time and I ran to my computer for support. As a result, I got into web design. I was hung up over a boy and life was just…crazy.


Buddy in the Blizzard of 2010, taken almost 7 years ago


Dear Cassidy,

Boy, do I have a lot to say to you. I’ll try my best to stay organized, but you know, we’ve never been good at that.

First off, I’m going to say this. Forget about the boy with the shaggy blonde hair that currently holds your heart. No one at that age has their shit together, especially 13-year-olds. You can’t expect anything to last at that age so save yourself the trouble, pretty please. You’ll only regret it later.

Your curiosity for computers is growing, keep it up. Because you’re going to major in it and it’s going to challenging but it’ll be awesome. You’re already learning stuff that you won’t see until your second year of college

You’re really insecure about yourself and that’s ok. You’ll learn to see how amazing and awe-inspiring you truly are and you’ll eventually be comfortable with the person you are.

You want to fit in with the popular crowd but honestly, you’re waisting your time. Think if it like this: you and all of your classmates are a bag of trail mix. You have the pretzels, the nuts, the M&Ms, etc. This popular crowd that you’re tying be a part of: they’re a bunch of nuts. You are a pretzel and no matter how much you try to convince the nuts that you’re a nut too, you won’t magically become a nut. You’re a pretzel and although you might be overwhelmed by the amount of nuts in your bag or trail mix, you need to embrace your inner pretzel.

To put it in simplest terms, no matter how many shirts you wear from Aeropostale, Abercrombie and Fitch, and the like, you’re still going to be Cassidy. Nothing you do will change that. So it is better to just embrace the fact that you’re different and not waste your time changing yourself so that you can gain approval from others. Like Shakespeare said, “To thine own self be true”.

You like to read and that’s good. Never underestimate the power of a good book. Especially at your age. A lot of times you’ll look to them to feel less alone and you’ll find lots of information about how to go about this crazy thing called life.

You’re looking to the future in order to find the relief that you need, to know that everything’s going to be ok. And it will be. You’re going to go through a lot of hard times in the next couple of years. You’re going to cry a ton. But on the other side of it, you’ll be stronger. Just hang in there.

Don’t forget to remember the little things. Although this shaggy blonde boy is breaking your heart, remember that you still have friends. Love them for as long as you can and don’t let them go. I wish I could say that those friendships will last into college, but they don’t.

One last piece of advice: although you may want to escape into cyberspace and never come out, don’t. You’ll learn later on that the world isn’t in a computer but  out there (*gestures outside window*) waiting for you. You’ll live a lot more in the real world than on the internet.

Give Buddy a kiss for me (because he’s gone now) and hug those friends for me, too.





  • Nancy

    I love how everyone is telling their past selves to forget about the boys. I would too- there’s no point in going after a guy who doesn’t know any better! The analogy of you and your classmates to a bag of trail mix is pretty well explained. Pretzels have their own gifts too ;). This is a sweet letter to your 13-year-old self. Keep doing what you do best and keep on being successful :).

  • Nikki B

    What a heart-filled letter to your 13-year-old self. I want to do this, but sadly I do not remember much from when I was 13 years old. Looking back I cannot even remember who I was desperately crushing on at the time. Maybe my autobiography I wrote at 17 would give me some hints and then I’ll be able to write myself this same letter. I loved yours. I know I had a shaggy-haired boy at that age too. Didn’t we all *rolls eyes*. Great job on the letter.

  • Georgie

    Thirteen is such a young age, I remember going through similar struggles when I was 13… with boys and stuff too. I didn’t get too attached but I was in a more serious relationship than anyone at thirteen should have been. It’s such a tender age for growing up and I think we were all naive back then.

    I wanted to be popular and I thought I should have been. I didn’t try, but the way the “popular” girls were just did not fit who I was. It took me many years to be comfortable with who I was and to realise that my friends loved me for who I was.

  • Rezina

    LOL at your nut analogy. I love it!

    I feel like 13 is a really fragile age. Not fragile as in weak but it’s just sort of that age where we’re beginning to “discover” ourselves and realize that we’re at that weird awkward age in-between childhood and teenage..hood? haha

    I also think it’s interesting to see that most of the letters have boy references! I wasn’t really thinking about boys that often because I’m a nerd and books lol

  • Kim

    Such a lovely letter to your old self, I especially love the trail mix analogy – those popular girls are nuts! Lol.

    I’ve read a few of these now on other blogs and really enjoy them, teenage me had a lot of struggles, it would of been great to know then what I know now. It’s important to be yourself and it’s OK to be geeky.

  • Sakura

    When we are young, we thought we are defined by what we wear and often go for branded clothing. Now that we are older (and hopefully wiser), we realised that we were never defined by what we wear but by how we act/behave.

  • Pauline

    It seems like boys took our heads when we were younger haha! It’s crazy how much they had a effect on us. Not anymore though!! I feel like I’ve finally reached the age where I dont need a guy to validate who I am and it was scary to think that before that was what I was holding out on!

  • Joy

    Hey, how have you been? 🙂 I wanted to let you know that I deleted my old blog ( and I’m now at as Joy 🙂 It would be super nice if you could change that! Thank you so much, I really appreciate it <3 Hope you have a nice day.