A Letter to My 13-Year-Old Self

I’ve been inspired by bloggers like Pauline and Georgie and their letters to their younger selves and I thought I would do something similar. When I was 13 (about 7 years ago), I was going through a very hard, awkward time and I ran to my computer for support. As a result, I got into web design. I was hung up over a boy and life was just…crazy.

 

Buddy in the Blizzard of 2010, taken almost 7 years ago

 

Dear Cassidy,

Boy, do I have a lot to say to you. I’ll try my best to stay organized, but you know, we’ve never been good at that.

First off, I’m going to say this. Forget about the boy with the shaggy blonde hair that currently holds your heart. No one at that age has their shit together, especially 13-year-olds. You can’t expect anything to last at that age so save yourself the trouble, pretty please. You’ll only regret it later.

Your curiosity for computers is growing, keep it up. Because you’re going to major in it and it’s going to challenging but it’ll be awesome. You’re already learning stuff that you won’t see until your second year of college

You’re really insecure about yourself and that’s ok. You’ll learn to see how amazing and awe-inspiring you truly are and you’ll eventually be comfortable with the person you are.

You want to fit in with the popular crowd but honestly, you’re waisting your time. Think if it like this: you and all of your classmates are a bag of trail mix. You have the pretzels, the nuts, the M&Ms, etc. This popular crowd that you’re tying be a part of: they’re a bunch of nuts. You are a pretzel and no matter how much you try to convince the nuts that you’re a nut too, you won’t magically become a nut. You’re a pretzel and although you might be overwhelmed by the amount of nuts in your bag or trail mix, you need to embrace your inner pretzel.

To put it in simplest terms, no matter how many shirts you wear from Aeropostale, Abercrombie and Fitch, and the like, you’re still going to be Cassidy. Nothing you do will change that. So it is better to just embrace the fact that you’re different and not waste your time changing yourself so that you can gain approval from others. Like Shakespeare said, “To thine own self be true”.

You like to read and that’s good. Never underestimate the power of a good book. Especially at your age. A lot of times you’ll look to them to feel less alone and you’ll find lots of information about how to go about this crazy thing called life.

You’re looking to the future in order to find the relief that you need, to know that everything’s going to be ok. And it will be. You’re going to go through a lot of hard times in the next couple of years. You’re going to cry a ton. But on the other side of it, you’ll be stronger. Just hang in there.

Don’t forget to remember the little things. Although this shaggy blonde boy is breaking your heart, remember that you still have friends. Love them for as long as you can and don’t let them go. I wish I could say that those friendships will last into college, but they don’t.

One last piece of advice: although you may want to escape into cyberspace and never come out, don’t. You’ll learn later on that the world isn’t in a computer but  out there (*gestures outside window*) waiting for you. You’ll live a lot more in the real world than on the internet.

Give Buddy a kiss for me (because he’s gone now) and hug those friends for me, too.

Love,

~Cass