There’s No Rest for the Wicked

Tomorrow will be my first day off in over two weeks and I’m super thrilled and so relieved. I think I’m going to use my day off to do a hike that I’ve always wanted to do. It’ll be a nice reprieve from my crazy life.

I could use a little break too because while I’m loving my internship and my job at the restaurant, it’s been hard to go through both without any breaks.

I recently kicked someone out of my life that I saw myself starting something with; but it the end, there was only confusion and anxiety and I kept getting the vibe that it was all one-sided. I’m not going to go into any more details because I want to protect my privacy as well the person I’m referring to.

But I did have some sort of epiphany as I read through my journal entries that I wrote in my freshman year of college. In one of them, I wrote out the following quote after another person left my life unexpectedly.

…people are flawed. They’re going to screw up more than once or twice. They’re going to make the same mistakes 10 or even 20 times before they realize what they’ve been doing wrong and make an effort to change it. And that’s why I’m so forgiving.

I’m not saying I forgive this person for what he did. At least not yet. I may forgive him eventually, just to help myself move on and to give myself peace of mind.

But as I read this quote that 18 year old me wrote, I realized that the person I’m supposed to end up with is probably out making some crazy mistakes. The thing is, whatever he’s doing right now will help him grow into someone that I’ll be happy to be with. And I’ll happily make some mistakes if it helps me become a better person in the long run.

I’m going to leave you with a snippet from a poem I wrote. It kind of reminds me that there are far better things ahead than any we leave behind.

 

So I drive these roads
Away from our hometown
I’ll no longer look back
There’s nothing but the past

And the things that could never be

 

6 thoughts on “There’s No Rest for the Wicked

  1. Mistakes helps us growing. And everybody does them. Now it depends of how bad we mess things up. But no matter what we do, we have to forgive ourselves first, and learn from our mistakes. Eventually we will grow into beautiful people. Take your time and maybe eventually you will forgive him. You were very wise writing that quote. It’s very true.

  2. Hope you enjoyed your day off! It’s good that you’re going to spend your free day doing something that’s not work. It gets overwhelming when you’re working nonstop.

    I’m sorry to hear that you had to kick someone out of your life. It is hard when you’re doing all of the work but sometimes, you need to do it for the sake of your mental health. We all make mistakes and it’s fine as long as we learn from them. That’s how we grow :).

  3. I am glad that you found out before hand that the relationship you were getting into was bad for you. I am glad that you recognized all the signs because most people don’t and yes, I’d love to see purple streaks in your hair! You definitely have to post up a picture when and if you do it!

  4. Going on hikes is always so refreshing and something I really enjoy doing especially after a long week in the office. Weekends are perfect for this! I’m lucky to have a good mix of city and nature where I live ^_^

    I’m sorry to hear that this guy has been causing you negative emotions. It always sucks but you always have to prioritise yourself first, even if that means cutting some people off. <3

  5. Hope you enjoyed that break and the hike 🙂 It’s good to ensure you get a break. Overworking and pushing yourself is never worth it. I did it a couple time and made myself sick instead of resting like I should’ve.

    Sorry to hear about the guy X_X I hope he will learn and grow, just like you will from this experience. It hurts now, but time will mend some of it, and you will meet other people (wonderful and not-so-wonderful) in the future.

  6. That sucks when we have to kick people out of our lives, but sometimes it’s for the better, especially if it was causing you any anxiety =/ We have to remember to take care of our mental health because it’s just as important. We all make mistakes, but how we deal with them is what shapes us. Learning and growing from them is definitely the way to go!

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